[WARNING] This post contains rage and dirty words and Louisiana.

Louisiana.

What the fuck man, I mean really, what the ACTUAL fuck.

In justification for his bill that puts a monument of the 10 commandments on display at the Louisiana state capital, Patrick Williams said The significance is historical, our laws are based on the Ten Commandments. In fact, without them, a lot of our laws would not exist.”

Wait a fucking second here. Are you FUCKING kidding me. 

First of all -

The Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense founded on the Christian religion

- article 11 of the Treaty of Tripoli

Second of all, lets look at the 10 commandments:

  • I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. You shall have no other gods before Me.
  • You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth; you shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me, but showing mercy to thousands, to those who love Me and keep My Commandments.
  • You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain.
  • Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God. In it you shall do no work: you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your male servant, nor your female servant, nor your cattle, nor your stranger who is within your gates. For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it.
  • Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
  • You shall not murder.
  • You shall not commit adultery.
  • You shall not steal.
  • You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
  • You shall not covet your neighbor’s house; you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor’s.

Okay, so, are we talking about US law or Louisiana law? Or are we fucking talking about people saying bullshit that falls the fuck apart as soon as you actually put some thought to it?

So, let’s look at the first commandment, it says not to have any other gods before god, last time I checked this wasn’t a law at any federal or state level.

The second commandment… What’s that? God’s jealous and doesn’t want you bowing down to carved images or worshiping them. Please point me to a state or federal law about this. Furthermore, you are breaking this commandment every time you bow down and pray in front of an image of Jesus or the Virgin Mary… just sayin’.

Commandment 3, god damn motherfucking son of a BITCH. Like GOD DAMN!!!! - shit, I hope I don’t get in trouble for breaking that law!!!!

At number 4 we have keeping the Sabbath day holy, fuck, someone better tell all the people who work in the service industry that they’re breaking the law, I’m going to have a looooong talk with Walmart.

Okay, moving on, let’s look at commandment 5, shit, you mean I could go to jail for not honoring my mother or father? Shit, I haven’t talked to my father in 15 years, the guy’s an asshole, I better hide from the police.

Commandment number 6 - Thou shall not murder, okay, we’re half way in and we’ve finally found something that is actually a law!!! Fuck dude, all glory to god for telling me that killing people isn’t cool. There is no way I would have figured that out on my own, nor would have countless other societies or cultures that aren’t Christian or don’t have laws based on Christian doctrine.

Commandment number - 7 - Thou shall not steal. Thank you god. I know how happy I am and how awesome it is when people steal my shit, I thought it was totally okay, and every other culture in the would did too, thank you for setting that straight.

Number 8 - You shall not commit adultery, okay, I actually wasn’t real clear on the laws concerning cheating on your spouse, so I did some fact checking (see, this is what you do when you don’t know the answer to something, you look it up and don’t make up speculative bullshit) - here is what I found concerning adultery in the US:

In the United States, laws vary from state to state. In those states where adultery is still on the statute book (although rarely prosecuted), penalties vary from life sentence (Michigan), to a fine of $10 (Maryland), to a Class I felony (Wisconsin). In the U.S. Military, adultery is a potential court-martial offense. The enforceability of adultery laws in the United States is unclear following Supreme Court decisions since 1965 relating to privacy and sexual intimacy of consenting adults.However, occasional prosecutions do occur.

So, I’ll kind of give you guys that one, but only kind of, but then again, I just did some more fact checking, and it seems adultery isn’t illegal in Louisiana, it is grounds for a divorce, but you can’t be arrested for it (as is the case, it seems, in most of the rest of the US).

Coming in at number nine we have “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor”. Okay, this can be interpenetrated a few different ways, but from what I understand by reading about it, it says you shouldn’t slander, lie, perjure yourself, “spread false reports” - it’s kind of ambiguous, but I think I should get in touch with every fucking politician ever, and anyone else I can think of that lies their ass off and let them know they are breaking the law.

While there are slander and perjury laws, laws like these have been around in one form or another (for example Roman law) before Christianity was.

Lastly, we have commandment #10, Fuck. I didn’t know I could go to jail because I think my neighbor had a hot wife or I wish I had a Dodge Viper too, that arrogant fuck.

If you want to put religions bullshit on government property, I think a much better option would be Jupiter, since a lot of western law is based off of what the Romans came up with.

So, Mr. Patrick Williams, please, kindly fuck off and get your facts straight.